waste on justifying and pursuading

No matter what the event is, I don't need to justify how come I don't feel good and I don't need to justify how come I should feel differently. I don't need to blame whatever it is I think the reason is that's keeping me from feeling good.

All of that is wasted effort. Normally we think, to find out this root cause there, we would try not to be there, but reflecting my case, it happens more and more since it's already memorized somewhere within me regardless of the efforts I try not to do with.
Just try to feel better RIGHT NOW.

With that better feeling, sometimes we act too much. ;)
Even in my rightness about a subject, when I try to push my rightness toward another who disagrees, no matter how right I am, it causes more pushing against. In other words, it is not that any real allowing of what I want can take place until I stop pushing.

My friend who is a teacher in a middle school has a issue-making student in her class. She has spent a lot of efforts on giving him her care by saying it's not good to skip the class, it's not good to smoke, you'd better be in time at school @@@@. Even after almost 1 term, he was not changed. She felt sick and tired of it and she told him

"If you think your acting is right and OK, just do it. I will not care you more no matter what you do, all are up to you. From now on, I will hand off from you. "

For a few of days after that, he was not shown even at school but his teacher, my friend did not contact him. He came to her 4 days later and he told her that "Teacher, I had thought it's free to skip the school and do smoke and so on and so on.... because school looks like jail and I'm like a prisoner. So I was trying to be against no matter what you say. However, now I realize it's not and understand why you did so to me. Sorry and thanks"

She spent more than 4 months on teaching him but it was in vain.
He spent 4 days on being aware of where he stands and he got it.
Teaching and Understanding is nothing to do with the time, the point is are we ready or not.